The couple from Leesburg, Indiana had been married a short while, when she started to get suspicious of her husband?s whereabouts since he had been returning home from work at very late hours everyday. She was left feeling lonely and sad, as though she was raising their baby girl on her own. This is not how she pictured her life to turn out. Worst of all, she started to become resentful that she had to stay at home with their daughter and she began to feel trapped. Was her husband not satisfied with her? Or was he caught up with something big at work? Could there be something else going on? All these thoughts and questions were incessantly running through her head as she tried to hone in on an answer. But then, one day, she discovered something while doing the family laundry.
She noticed something particular about her husband?s clothes that she hadn?t picked up on before. She was absolutely shocked by what it revealed about her husband?s late nights. In fact, this discovery she made would change her entire view of their relationship and their lives together, and we all have something to learn from it.
Jonna Miller and her husband David, both in their 20?s, started dating in October 2012. One year later, over Thanksgiving dinner in front of 25 people, David proposed to Jonna. It was a special Thanksgiving that year and the couple had much to be thankful for; Jonna was also six months pregnant.
The lovebirds felt like they were living a real-life fairy tale and were so excited to become parents. Jonna gave birth to their daughter, Delanie, in February 2014. The following year, in May 2015, the couple made things official and tied the knot. They were a happy family of three.
Jonna grew up in a small town in Indiana. She describes herself as “a small town Indiana girl with a big mouth." She spent most of her free time hanging around the town. “Telling bad jokes and creating awkward situations” is how she sums up the way in which she spent her time.
Her childhood turned out to be the perfect foundation for her future self which would be producing videos and blog content laden with sarcasm and humor.
Many people better know Jonna by her social media name "The Blunt Blonde." In her "about me" on Twitter, she introduces herself quite starkly when she says "People think I’m always joking but I’m not. I’m genuinely an unpleasant person and hate everyone equally.” On her blog site she shares "If you haven’t caught on, I am fluent in English and Sarcasm.
I’m a woman of many trades, what can I say? I’m currently a stay-at-home slave. My boss is almost three feet tall, messier than shit and really piles the work on my non-existent desk. So I’m pretty confident that I will not have any hair left by the time I reach my 30’s…" Her blog posts follow suit with the same self-deprecating humor.
Her husband's childhood was drastically different than Jonna's. David grew up in the Amish community.
When the couple tied the knot, the groomsmen all wore bowties. Jonna shares on her blog "When I picked out ties for the guys to wear, my husband carefully notified me from a distance, 'They can only wear bow-ties.' I stared. He said slowly 'Amish people cannot wear ties.'I exploded."
David's Amish community, a hardline Swiss-German religious sect, favors plain living and rejects modern technology.
While the couple grew up starkly different, they make it work. Jonna shares "Sure, we have different backgrounds but they say opposites attract and in our case, this couldn’t be truer. He’s calm, I’m a psycho. He knows how to drive a buggy, they let me drive a pony cart once and I almost crashed into a tree. He asks me how to get on Google, I get on the internet and run my mouth every day. I love my in-laws, I love my husband and dammit I may not be Amish but I’ve had it in me."
His wife shared on her blog that David has become “well adjusted to his new ‘English’ lifestyle.” Despite the strides he made to adopting a new kind of lifestyle, Jonna was entertained enough by the Amish quirks that David has been unable to rid himself of and used this as inspiration to write a blog post about these habits. She titled the blog “You can take a Man out of the Amish but…”
She shares that before meeting David, she didn't know much about the Amish: "All I really knew about them was that they made doughnuts that would slap your taste buds with a happiness you’ve never experienced before."
In her blog, Jonna shares many thoughts on married life with David and on parenting. However, this isn't your typical mommy blog.
Jonna shares it all with hilarious self-deprecating humor and sarcasm. Her stories will have you falling off your seat. Plus, how many blog writers out there have an Amish husband? That definitely switches things up a bit.
Jonna is a housewife and a stay-at-home mom. Despite caring for their daughter and the home, she finds the time to maintain her blog and online presence.
Actually, it seems like her set-up is the perfect one for a blogger. She gets to spend time with her daughter while working.
David works at an RV dealership nearby and has long hours. Jonna accepts that her husband works late and says that he often comes home even later than he had planned.
Jonna has shared that this leaves her feeling rather lonely and at a loss of what to do with herself and about the situation. A feeling that many stay at home moms can relate to. Marriage isn't always what it's cracked up to be, people don't ride off into the sunset together and live happily ever after.
In December 2015, she was quite transparent about her situation with her blog followers. She wrote, “I’m married to a hard-working man and I would be lying if I said that it didn’t take a toll on me. Sometimes he will come home after a long day at work and I’ll be waiting for him to walk in the door, so I can yell ‘you promised me you would be home at five!’ As if he would rather be working than spending time with me and our daughter.”
Jonna’s fairy-tale vision of what her Prince Charming would look like was quite different from her reality. Her Prince Charming had “rough, cracks hands and crows feet” and he wasn’t even 30 yet.
She added, “I’m putting him in a lose-lose situation. He literally can’t win. If he doesn’t work late, we won’t get the new furniture set that I have to have. If he does work later, he comes home to a nagging wife who is desperate for his attention.” She continued, “I am so selfish in our marriage and I know that. But, every once in a while, I’ll have my little ‘A-ha’ moment that gives me a sense of understanding.”
Jonna's blog posts are so real, so relatable. She tells it like it is and hearing that sort of honesty is very admirable.
On a particular Wednesday evening, Jonna was on the floor with Delanie playing with dolls when David once again wasn't coming home, although it was already very late. She kept his dinner in the fridge for him to eat when he eventually came home.
“I don’t recall the Prince missing dinners because he was working overtime or going to bed shortly after he came home to his Palace because he was so exhausted. I don’t remember any of that,” she wrote.
While she played dolls with her child on the floor, her mind was anywhere but with her child. Her mind, like David's was going 100 miles an hour. She started to become enraged preemptively, as she thought about how furious she was going to be when her husband walked through the door.
She had turned into a shrew, a nagging wife without realizing it all because she felt she wasn’t getting the attention she needed. She would literally be seething with all the things that she would accuse him of when he tiredly walked through the door later on.
Jonna was still waiting for David to come home when she heard the clothes dryer finish its cycle. While she would normally turn the laundry back on in order to avoid folding it, she made a responsible decision. She would fold the warm clothes in order to calm herself down and take her mind off of her husband.
Despite the attempts she made, her mind was still on David as she removed the clothing from the dryer.
She explained to her readers in her blog post that she began to think, “Why does he not want to spend time with me? We’re newlyweds, aren’t we supposed to be in the honeymoon stage?” This is a thought that anybody could relate to.
Your spouse isn't coming home until late and you start to wonder whether you are doing something wrong. The feeling of the lack of security in your relationship can drive you crazy.
She began to fold the laundry like every other time and form two piles of clothes. She placed her clothes in one pile and David's in another, and was ready to put them away in their closets. But that is when she noticed something very different about their clothing.
Until this moment, she had missed making this observation before. Now she spotted something unusual about his clothes compared to her own. How had she never noticed this before? Perhaps it was because her mind was always distracted by all the things she has to do and by her daughter.
So, what on earth was this epiphany she had about his clothing? Jonna shared with her readers what was going through her mind. “Why did my clothes look so vibrant, clean and new? His were dingy, stained and torn.”
Her mind immediately shot to all of the shopping she had been doing and how he was always buying her clothes. She couldn't remember the last time he bought new clothes.
Then, she understood something immediately. She realized just how much of a sacrifice her husband was making for her.
She further explained "This man provided more than I deserve. If I tell him I want something, very seldom will he tell me no.”
Jonna said that the realization immediately overwhelmed her with feelings of guilt.
She was letting her husband spoil her with nice clothes, while he dressed in shabby and faded clothing. And to add to this, she was feeling angry that he was absent so much when he was really out making money so that he could take care of his family.
Jonna wrote, “I get spoiled with the fruits of his labor and he is okay with a pair of torn boxer briefs. I was acting as if he was out partying with his friends, but his laundry told a completely different story.”
While we may not all have that same experience, the message behind her realization is definitely something that many people can relate to. We often take for granted the sacrifices that our partners make for us and don't fully appreciate them because we are stuck in our own world and needs.
The caused Jonna to think about how it wasn't just her husband's clothes that had suffered the pressure of hard-work.
I mean, look at that bond between the two of them. Does that look like a father that wants to be away from his daughter? No, David would have wanted nothing more than to be there with his family.
The hard-work was taking an emotional and physical tole on David himself. His hands were in weak-form, blistered, rough, and cracked.
He was often skipping dinner or going to sleep early because he was so exhausted from his long and draining day of work.
Jonna also shared that David didn’t seem to be bothered by the late nights.
She told her followers, “His heart is full when he walks in [through] the door and our daughter runs for him excitedly yelling, ‘Dada!’ His dreams have come true of being able to be a man and provide for his family. He has everything he has ever wanted in life.”
After having the revelation, Jonna made one promise to herself: she would be a better wife.
She wouldn't complain when her husband would come home late from work. She would remember this moment with the laundry and remember that her husband was making big sacrifices for the betterment of the family.
She wrote, “Sure, I miss him and want to spend time with him throughout the week, but I have realized he is offering me the most beautiful form of love there is… He works to give our family everything we need. He works so his wife and daughter don’t go without, even though there are times I’m sure he does.”
The two would agree on one thing, that the most important thing is for their daughter to be happy and that she has all what she needs. And David would even add in that Jonna's happiness is equally as important to him. You know what they say, "A happy wife, a happy life."
And Jonna has some advice for other wives and partners who find that they feel lonely while their other halves are at work.
She concludes her blog post with a suggestion for a new and improved way of thinking about the problem. Jonna sums up, “If you have a hard-working man in your life and you can’t comprehend how much he loves you… Do his laundry.”
Although not all of her readers can personally relate to Jonna's laundry experience, the story hits home for plenty of women.
One reader commented on the article, saying "This is an amazing reminder. I used to stay home with our daughters when they were little, and I used to feel horrible doing the same thing. This is an awesome perspective to carry.”
Nowadays, Jonna continues to write blogs for her website "The Real Blunt Blonde."
In her blog, Jonna documents many aspects of her family life. Because many readers are fascinated with the Amish culture, many of her posts focus on David's upbringing and background.
In one blogpost – “I’m not Amish but my Husband is” – Jonna shares how her and David met and how he introduced her to his parents. She also makes fun of some of the misconceptions she had about the Amish before she got to know the culture better.
She writes about how the first time David brought her home to meet his Amish parents, she was shocked to see that there was light on in the home.
As fascinating as his background is, her husband isn't the only thing she writes about. She writes a lot about motherhood and their daughter Delanie. In 2016, she wrote a lot about her daughter's terrible twos. During this phase of child development, toddlers start to act rebellious against their parents.
Jonna used these struggles to create hilarious content. She describes the terrible two's as a "phase where your child is anything but cute, sweet and adorable. It’s like I’m in another dimension, or maybe even on drugs. What is happening? Did I just do drugs? Do I know any drug dealers? Should I do drugs?"
An article called, “I Graduated at the University of Toddler Town and Majored in Defeat,” tells funny yet frustrating stories of everyday life with her daughter at that stage. The terrible twos is a normal stage in children's development during which they struggle between seeking independence and still relying on their parents.
A great way to deal with the difficult phase is to write humorous blogs about it, which Jonna seems to be doing perfectly.
Now Delanie is well past the terrible twos, and her daughter is almost four-years-old. And, although parenthood can be difficult, it seems Jonna and her daughter are making some truly memorable moments together.
Indeed, this past July, Jonna and David took Delanie to Disneyland to meet Cinderella, an experience which Jonna filmed and later posted to Facebook.
Jonna must have loved seeing how happy her little girl was. She says that although she was shy at first, her face lit up when she met the Disney princess.
And of course, David probably had to work a few late nights to be able to pay for the trip for the three of them, something that he was unassumingly happy to do for his family's happiness.