It might be the British comic duo Jennifer Saunders and Dawn French, but that still doesn’t excuse them from making these bad decisions. Okay, so perhaps it’s in the name of comedy. The cut of the dress looks like it’s fit for an old-timey bar in medieval England… or modern-day Germany? They might be empty-handed but it would be great if they just whipped out two large beer steins.
Let that be a message to you then. If you’re a bride thinking of giving these dresses to your bridesmaids, be aware that they were worn once as a joke. The pom-pom head crowns just really top it off perfectly. Way to go, girls!
Modest Is Hottest
Whether it’s religion, dress code, or personal preference, some women prefer dressing modestly for big events. Whoever picked out these shiny blue bridesmaid dresses definitely went the “modest is hottest” route because these outfits don’t show off anything but their beautiful faces. The color combo of blue, yellow, and white isn’t that bad, but even that can’t salvage these dresses.
The neckline and sleeves make it look like these ladies are wearing cropped bolero jackets over their dresses. But that’s not the case. Those bulky sleeves are part of the dress. There’s no escaping them. Why, oh why, did they have to be long-sleeved?
Winter Wonderland Ice Princesses
Oh boy. Having a winter-themed wedding can be chic and glamorous. It can also be extremely tacky if it isn’t done the right way. Unfortunately, these bridesmaid dresses were a total fail. Those faux fur wraps make these ladies look like they’re getting ready to star in “The Nutcracker” or “The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe.”
Let’s not forget to mention that the giant white bows tying the fur stoles together look tacky rather than elegant. This whole look is more “Barbie” than “Winter Wonderland.” We get the look that they were going for, but it just doesn’t work.
Dandelion Madness
Marty Wilde and Joyce Baker were a pretty big deal back in the 50s and 60s. All eyes were on them when they got married in 1959 in Greenwich, London. All eyes were also on their bridesmaids because they were also famous. Joyce’s friends and co-singers from The Vernons Girls acted as her bridesmaids for the December ceremony.
Their dresses are quintessentially 60s, with flared skirts and cute squared necklines. This look wouldn’t be half-bad if it weren’t for those weird hats. The tulle makes these women look like they’re human-sized dandelions about to take off with the wind. We’re not sure what the thinking behind this look was because those hats don’t look flattering on anybody.
Pretty in Pink
PSA: Satin fabric is really hard to pull off. No matter how hot you are, satin will highlight every wrinkle, bump, and panty line in the wrong lighting and conditions. Apparently, no one got the memo in the 60s because there were satin bridesmaid dresses as far as the eye could see. These bridesmaids look like bright pink candy wrappers out of Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory.
The ruffled neckline looks like something out of a Dr. Seuss illustration, and those floofy bows aren’t helping. At least the bridesmaid in the middle had the bright idea to secure it on the back of her head instead of the front. The bridesmaid on the far right didn’t get the memo because she went all in and put that bow smack-dab in the middle of her forehead. Girl.